Everyone Needs to Know About Money Trauma

Everyone Needs to Know About Money Trauma

Everyone Needs to Know About Money Trauma

Lisa-Maree Botticelli

Mindset & Wealth Coach

 

Did you know that deepening your capacity to receive more money is a surefire way to accelerate your income?  

One of the big patterns, I see consistently, that stops people from receiving more money – because I have it myself – is intergenerational trauma. This is impacting many entrepreneurs and investors and their ability to allow themselves to receive more money. This is one of the key reasons, I often have clients come to me, they want to increase their income, and present with money issues, like:

  • Not earning enough money, or
  • Wanting to increase their income, but stuck at a certain amount.
  • Not charging enough for their services.
  • Some are overspending, or underspending,
  • Some can’t keep money, and find it hard to save.
  • Often, in couples one may be a spender, the other an investor and this creates a money block.
  • Some clients are afraid of becoming visible in their business and their relationships.
  • Some stop themselves from allowing themselves to receive enough money and do not have an abundant lifestyle where they thrive & flourish.
  • Others can’t increase their income, because they are worrying so much.
  • Many have lots of blocks and fears holding them back.
  • Some just don’t know they have limiting beliefs from their family of origin and they stay stuck for years in a never ending cycle of frustration and scarcity thinking.
  • Many people are earning a great income and know they want to earn more, so they can create more impact in the world, but are stuck at a threshold they haven’t been able to cross.
 

While many entrepreneurs and investors focus on increasing their income, the real obstacle often lies beneath the surface – personal issues that hinder their ability to receive. Money is just a symptom of this deeper struggle. If you want to cultivate a healthier relationship with money and enhance your life, the journey begins with self-improvement. Start by nurturing a better relationship with yourself, and watch how it ripples out into your financial world.

Join me in a captivating interview below with my incredible mentor, Tash Corbin where we delve deep into the delicate world of intergenerational trauma. Then, keep the momentum going, as I unveil my THREE key creative strategies to help you break free from the grips of money trauma.

Let’s start breaking the chains of money trauma with more on how money beliefs originate.

‘This belief ran in my family, until it ran into me.  Let it stop with me’.

UNKNOWN
How Do Money Beliefs Start?

Have you ever wondered where your money beliefs originate? It’s a complex web of family history and childhood messages that lay the foundation for our financial beliefs later in life. In my case, having indigenous heritage while, also being white presenting has led to assumptions of confidence and an easy life, devoid of challenges. The truth, however, is quite different. I’ve grappled with intergenerational trauma myself, and I began embarking on a journey of personal development to conquer the challenges it brought into my life.

Intergenerational trauma is like a baton passed from one generation to the next, a cycle that persists and is passed down from generation to generation until someone stands up and says, ‘this has to stop’.  In many families, there’s that one person who takes the reins and initiates the healing journey. It’s a courageous step towards breaking the chain of inherited family trauma.

Let’s be honest… intergenerational trauma is something most of us have experienced in our lives. The beliefs it weaves can be remarkably limiting, even overwhelmingly debilitating. But how do you know if intergenerational trauma is at play in your life? Look out for these telling signs:

  • Low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, insomnia.
  • Anger, and self-destructive or sabotaging behaviours.
  • Irritability, nightmares, fearfulness.
  • Lack of trust in others.
  • Carrying guilt and shame that doesn’t belong to them.
  • Unresolved grief.

WATCH my interview with my mentor, Tash Corbin where we delve deep into the intricate world of intergenerational trauma.  On the right, press PLAY to listen to our FB Live interview.

Next, I unveil my THREE key strategies to help you break free from the grip of money trauma below.

'Don't let money run your life, let money help you run your life better'. ~ John Rampton
Unlock Abundance: Three Powerful Strategies to Transform Your Money Story.

Have you ever stopped to think about the beliefs we inherit from our families, how they shape our journey, and influence our adulthood? This is the origin of your money narrative and its evolution. A first step on the path to rewriting your money story is to heal your relationship with money.   Here, I unveil three pivotal strategies that will not only help you unveil and transform your money story but also empower you to create a life and business filled with abundance today and in the future.

1. Declutter Your Mind When You Journal

Journalling is a great way to declutter and debrief on any challenges you may be experiencing.  Writing in a journal about what emotions are coming up for you around money is a very helpful way to process your experience. Ready to dive in? Here are some thought-provoking questions you might like to journal on:

  • What money stories or themes did you hear about in your family growing up?
  • How have these money stories or themes impacted you and your family?
  • What ways do your family use to manage challenging situations?

If you want to know more on how to declutter limiting thoughts and beliefs through journalling, I’ve created a Manifesting Magic journal here that includes 30 days of daily manifestation journalling & prompts, why not set yourself free when you create new positive thoughts and daily habits to support your goals and dreams?

2. Upgrade Your Money Mindset with Mandalas

Harnessing the power of creativity to connect with our unconscious mind is the quickest way to uncover outdated money beliefs and patterns in need of an upgrade.  Clearing these money blocks paves the way for new possibilities.  Since ‘nature abhors a vaccum’, the next step is to envision what you truly desire in your life.  Regardless of the past, there’s always room for fresh beliefs and creating new opportunities.

Mandalas are a great way to clear and release painful memories without it being too overwhelming.  The simple act of drawing a circle and pouring your emotions into it is like decluttering your inner world. It brings equilibrium to the chaos and serves as a potent tool for releasing any experiences or blocks that might be holding you back. Ready to try this simple, yet profound exercise:

  • Drawing or making marks on paper is beneficial, as it allows for expression and release of events that may be traumatic.
  • Grab an A4 or A3 blank paper and some coloured pens.
  • Choose an event, or experience where you wanted more money and you didn’t believe you deserved to have more.
  • Make it challenging, but, not so big that you feel overwhelmed.
  • Start by writing one word in the top left hand corner to describe the event.
  • Then, begin making marks or drawing an image inside the circle.
  • Allow yourself expression of the event and release those emotions you have around it.
  • Once expressed on paper, the energy and connection to the event is lessened and even, dispelled, altogether.
  • Take a look at your image and see how this feels to you.
  • Write one word that comes to mind, without thinking too much about it, write this in the top right hand corner.
  • Once finished, you may like to pin your mandala up in a location where you will see it or you may like to light a candle to finish letting go of the situation by blessing it and sending it on its way, to free you up, even further.
3. Changing Your Beliefs

Our childhood is where we learn the beliefs we carry into adulthood, many of which limit our choices, and, our vision of what is possible for our life.  Often, we take on these beliefs to fit into our family dynamics, even, when they don’t align with our true selves.  Taking on family beliefs passed through generations can create a fixed mindset and hinders our growth.

These limiting beliefs hold family members back from thriving.  A lot of couples can find it hard to be on the same page making conversations around money stressful and left unresolved.  How do you, both get on the same page around money, so the whole family can not just thrive, but flourish? If you want to be supported to release what’s holding you back, then I invite you to schedule a Money Matters for Couples session here where you will be supported to release limiting beliefs and create an abundance mindset.

Flourish with Pure Creativity Coaching

“Wealth is not about having a lot of money.  It’s about having options.”

Chris Rock

To initiate change is to expand our consciousness, embracing more empowering beliefs that support the creation of an abundant life. When doing this we begin to shift our mindset from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset. This shift signifies a transition from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset, a crucial step in breaking free from unproductive family cycles.

Here’s a practical way to turn negative money beliefs into positive beliefs that support you better.  Start with drawing two columns, on the left you will write ten limiting beliefs you have around money, perhaps, they are statements you heard your parents say while you were growing up.  Once you have this list of ten statements, in the right hand column turn these negative statements into positive statements that you’d like to believe about money.  Once you have these new beliefs put this new list up somewhere that you will see it each day, perhaps, it’s on your desk, or near your breakfast table and read them out loud to yourself, each day until you feel that you truly believe them and are confident that you can embody them, as part of your new money story.

If this is interesting to you, send me an email to connect@purecreativitycoaching.com, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this, or if you have any questions, ask me anything and I will send you some tips that will help you create more financial freedom.

Ready to Attract Abundance & Financial Freedom?  Unlock a brighter future with a brand new money story. Join me for a free clarity call where we’ll delve into money matters, uncover strategies to release trauma, and pave the way for you to open the flow to abundance of wealth. Don’t miss out. I invite you to Book your spot now and let’s embark on transforming your money journey together!

 

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How to Let Go of the Past

How to Let Go of the Past

How to Let Go of the Past When All You Want to Do is Hang On!

Lisa-Maree Botticelli

Mindset & Wealth Coach

Why Is It Important to Let Go of the Past?

Melody Beattie in her book, ‘The Language of Letting Go’, talks about working through issues from within your family of origin, as a way to learn how to love and respect yourself.  If you’re someone who puts others first before yourself, then, setting boundaries is a really important first step towards self-care.

Have you ever been in a situation where you wanted to say, “No” to someone, but were afraid they would get angry with you? There are three important tools to getting over the stress of saying, “No,” so that you can take better care of yourself in your important relationships.

‘Finishing our business from the past helps us form new and healthier relationships’.

MELODY BEATTIE

Why Work Through Personal Issues?

Melody Beattie says, “The more we work through our family of origin issues, the less we will find ourselves needing to work through them with the people we’re attracted to. Finishing our business from the past helps us form new and healthier relationships.

The more we overcome our need to be excessive caretakers, the less we will find ourselves attracted to people who need to be constantly taken care of.  The more we learn to love and respect ourselves, the more we will become attracted to people who will love and respect us and who we can safely love and respect.

How to Let Go of the Past

This is a slow process. We need to be patient with ourselves. The type of people we find ourselves attracted to does not change overnight.  However, part of learning to love and respect ourselves begins with setting boundaries, and is the number one tool for improving your overall wellbeing.

Family Therapist, Sarri Gilmore’s insights on the importance of setting good boundaries begins with listening to your inner compass as a way for making decisions that support your self-care.  She says this is the best guidance for learning when to say “NO” and discover when saying “YES” would leave you stressed and ignoring your own needs.  In this video, Sarri shares stories and tools to strengthen your boundaries. Click PLAY to watch the video, ‘Good Boundaries Free You’.  After watching the video, scroll down to LEARN THREE TOOLS FOR LETTING GO OF THE PAST.

“Boundaries emerge from deep within. They are connected to letting go of guilt and shame, and to changing our beliefs about what we deserve." Melody Beattie
Learn These Three Tools for Letting Go of the Past

Being attracted to dysfunctional people can linger long and well into recovery. That does not mean we need to allow it to control us. The fact is, we will initiate and maintain relationships with people we need to be with until we learn what it is we need to learn—no matter how long we’ve been recovering.  However, a first step on the path to recovering from relationships that no longer serve you is to set boundaries.  Here are three important tools to help you:

1. Let Your Inner Compass Guide You

There’s something magical about reaching that point of becoming ready to set a limit. Your Inner Compass will guide you, so paying attention to this inner voice will help you to develop trust in yourself.  We know when we mean what we say; others take us seriously too. Things change, not because we’re controlling others, but because we’ve changed.”

2. Saying “No.”

No matter who we find ourselves relating to, and what we discover happening in the relationship, the issue is still about us, and not about the other person.  Learning to say, “no” to people who are unhealthy for you will eliminate the brief stress of setting a boundary.

3. Changing Your Beliefs

Boundaries emerge from deep within.  They are connected to letting go of guilt and shame, and to changing our beliefs about what we deserve.  As our thinking about this becomes clearer, so will our boundaries.  Boundaries are also connected to a Higher Timing, than our own. We’ll set a limit when we’re ready, and not a moment before.  So will others.

“Things change, not because we’re controlling others, but, because we’ve changed.”

MELODY BEATTIE

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Why Being More Creative Improves Your Mental & Physical Health

Why Being More Creative Improves Your Mental & Physical Health

Why Being More Creative Improves Your Mental & Physical Health.

Lisa-Maree Botticelli

Mindset & Wealth Coach

It’s official!  Science now tells us that kids aren’t the only ones needing unstructured playtime and time to fuel their imagination. Many adults could do with using more activities requiring imagination, innovation and playful improvisation also.  Research now shows studies based on brain-imaging has found that creativity alters our brain chemistry and boosts our physical and mental health.

‘You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have’.

MAYA ANGELOU

Time to Reconnect and Enhance Your Creative Ability 

Did you know that reading poetry and the classics can be more helpful than, a self-help book.  And, knitting is significantly therapeutic, much like listening to music.  When we go to an gallery just to appreciate art, this can dramatically lower our stress and anxiety levels and has a flow on effect of helping you to be calm, relaxed and happy?

It has also been found that drawing, journalling, reading poetry, making arts and crafts can be very helpful in relaxing your mind, your muscles, lowers inflammation and indigestion problems. It also improves positive self-esteem, as well as increased productivity. This is because creative pursuits help us focus our attention, similar to the way that meditating does.

Flow is the key ingredient to accessing the many physical, emotional and mental benefits of creativity. Psychologist, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in his book, ‘Flow’ talks about the state we enter when we are so engaged in our creative process that we even seem to lose track of time, temporarily forgetting ourselves, our problems and internal chaos. When we are in flow we tend to forget what’s happening in our lives currently and even, what’s happening in our bodies.  We find that negative thoughts disappear during this time.  For some they achieve this state when they are doing physical exercise, however, even tasks that involve repetition like knitting, crochet help to alleviate strong emotions and have a a calming effect on our nervous system.

If you’re feeling depressed or high anxiety, current research from neurological studies have found engaging in activities with meaning and purpose, including creative passions work like your own internal medicine and act much like a natural anti depressant and mood enhancer. Ask yourself, are you in need of a mental, or physical enhancement?  And, if the answer if yes, it may be time to focus on your creative passions and increase the time you spend doing these activities.  One way to reconnect to your creativity is by taking yourself on a weekly artist date, where you go by yourself on a date, or activity that reconnects you to an activity you love to do, but have stopped doing for one reason or another.

Enjoy this video where Julia Cameron talks about how taking yourself on an Artist Date brings playful delight back into your life.

“Stressed out? When was the last time you took time out and wrote in a journal?

Take Yourself to an Art Exhibit, or Museum

You may have had a mind-stretching, body tingling experience where you were looking at a painting, sculpture or other artwork, you know what I’m talking about.  Perhaps you are unsure about art, or have the idea that art is not for you.  Rest assured you don’t have to be all artsy to enjoy art.  You don’t even have to understand it to be able to get something from it.  Just remain curious and allow your body to have it’s natural response to what your experiencing.  If you have just one moment where you can experience wonder, then, that is what counts and is having a positive benefit on you.

Emotions are processed by a special area of the brain and when our pleasure centres are activated by contemplating a painting or other artwork even, when it’s not  immediately clear what the artwork is about. Our brains, bodies and emotions are positively rewarded. Signals to the brain are the same as when we’re daydreaming, or thinking about the future and enhances the pleasure and reward mode even further. There is also an area called, ‘the interior insult’ that is associated with the experience of pain that is activated, and this may be due to our brains trying process and find meaning in the art work. Taking time out to go to an art exhibit, or museum, even taking a painting class can be very rewarding as a result and will often change your brain’s neuroplasticity by activating and enhancing the reward centres through repetitive positive signals.

Why Not Start Writing a Daily Journal? 

Are you stressed out? When was the last time you wrote in a journal? Most people are too busy replying to a full inbox each day, a huge to-do list to even consider the benefits of journalling for themselves each day.  But, before you discount it completely there are many health benefits to writing worth considering.  Many people are walking around with a huge amount of stress too big to handle.  The cortisol produced through constant activation of stress hormones is very harmful and taxing to our immune systems leading to serious health problems, if you don’t put a stop to it in time.

The British Journal of Health Psychology published a study that showed how releasing the stress caused by emotional topic through writing or journaling actually lowered people’s cortisol levels.  It is well known that expressive writing of a personal nature is very relieves long term suffering from any kind of psychological trauma. The study showed who wrote in a journal slept better,  and this led to improved mood, as well as the ability to heal faster.

Reading Challenging Literature

Most people love to read, isn’t that what you’re doing right now? Did you know that reading topics that provide a challenge for example, Shakespeare provides many health benefits for brain and your mental health? Scans of the brain have found the more challenging texts, prose and poetry show more electrical activity is sparked off in the brain than, reading easier text, or more conventional and predictable language.

Philip Davis, an English Professor in the Magnetic Resonance Centre, at Liverpool University, UK after a research study on the effects of reading William Shakespeare, William Wordsworth, T.S. Eliot and others has on the brain, says, “When you read literature of a higher level leads to mental shifts in pathways and help to create new thoughts, shapes, and connections whether you’re young or old.

Read More Poetry

The same study found regularly reading poetry, leads to an increase in activity in the right hemisphere of the brain, the area connected to ‘autobiographical memory’. Poetry is very helpful in being able to reflect on our own life experiences and compare them to what we are reading.  It also lights up the part of the brain concerned with language. Professor Davis says, “Poetry is not just a matter of style. It is a matter of deep versions of experience that add the emotional and biographical to the cognitive,”.

There is also evidence poetry affects our brains in the same way music does. Everyone knows the feeling when they hear a song, they really connect with.  This is because the areas of the brain affected by music are the same that are aroused by reading poetry, particularly, the musical resonance of poetry, like rhythm, tone, cadence and word usage.

““Poetry is not just a matter of style. It is a matter of deep versions of experience that add the emotional and biographical to the cognitive.”

PROF. DAVIS

Get Artsy

Some experts equate the benefits of creative flow from art and craft activities with a meditative experience, in that it helps to regulate your emotions and focus your attention, much like a mental exercise would. Whether you’re building and restoring furniture, doing wood turning, printmaking, painting ceramics, doing art activities creates a state of deep relaxation, one that completely alters your physical and emotional responses to stress.  Art therapy is a great starting place for reconnecting to your natural self expression.  People have described feeling very relaxed and connected to themselves again, after attending an Art Therapy workshop.

Being creative is a combination of self-expression, problem solving, creative improvisation and mindfulness, slowing down your breathing, decreasing heart rate, lowering blood pressure and releasing muscle tension.

Sculpting, scrapbooking, sewing, painting, printmaking, collaging, throwing ceramics and pottery, gardening even, doing home repairs all of these tasks activate your brain’s reward centres releasing dopamine, which is a neurotransmitter, also known as a natural antidepressant. The other important factor is the building of community and friendships with these activities and this is one of the best antidotes to depression.  Imagine how blissed out you can be when you get crafty or arty!

Keep On Knitting

Many knitters and crocheters find relief from stress when they do this regularly.  They also said their cognitive functioning was higher. Not only that being in the company of fellow knitters was one of their greatest rewards. Research shows being part of a knitting community increased “perceived happiness” as a result of social contact and interaction with others.  This in turn, improved mood and   brain health.  It has been proven knitting has significant psychological, social and therapeutic benefits providing much potential for helping with managing stress, depression, long-term illness and physical pain.

Your Hands are Tools for Creating Meaning

Using your hands for meaningful creative tasks is a great way to elevate your mood, stimulate your brain and senses as well as create better internal well-being according to physician + writer team, Carrie and Alton Barron who recommend doing this for at least 20-30 minutes daily.

Discover Your True Self and Open Up A New World

We exercise our brains daily through our work, so it makes perfect sense to also indulge our creative side too.  This then, teaches patience, perseverance and creates a sense of pride as well as helping to develop fine motor skills. Just sitting with others who share your interests will move you closer to discovering who you truly are.

Want more?  Get Access to HOW TO AWAKEN YOUR CREATIVE VISION WITH 50 SHADES OF COLOUR, fill in your details below.

How to Unleash Your Creativity

How to Unleash Your Creativity

How to Unleash Your Creativity.

Lisa-Maree Botticelli

Mindset & Wealth Coach

In this TED talk, Elizabeth Gilbert muses on the impossible things we expect from artists and geniuses. She also shares the radical idea there is a ‘genius’ inside of all us.  How would you like to know how to unlock your inner genius and unleash your creativity?

‘If you’re alive, you’re a creative person.’

ELIZABETH GILBERT

Does Creativity Come From Us, or Is It Spiritual?

In Ancient Greece and Ancient Rome, people did not happen to believe that creativity came from human beings back then, OK? People believed that creativity was this divine attendant spirit that came to human beings from some distant and unknowable source, for distant and unknowable reasons.

Elizabeth Gilbert, Author of the New York Times Best Seller, ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ talks about how we all have a genius with and asks why are we afraid of this creative power?  She goes on to say whenever we start talking about creativity everyone gets a little nervous and starts worrying about their mental health. Elizabeth suggests we help those creative people, so their genius can come out.

Enjoy this TedX talk where Elizabeth Gilbert discusses how elusive your Creative Genius is and let me know what you think about her ideas.  When you’ve finished watching the video, scroll down to fill in your details and access your FREE DOWNLOAD to Awaken Your Creative Vision.

'Pure creativity is something better than a necessity; it’s a gift. It’s the frosting'. ~ Elizabeth Gilbert

How Can We Do Creativity Differently?

 

Creativity itself doesn’t care at all about results – the only thing it craves is the process.  Learn to love the process and let whatever happens next happen, without fussing too much about it.  Work like a monk, or a mule, or some other representative metaphor for diligence.  Love the work.

 

Destiny will do what it wants with you, regardless.

“If you are given only one opportunity to speak, be certain your voice is heard.”

ELIZABETH GILBERT

Want more?  Get access to AWAKEN YOUR CREATIVE VISION WITH 50 SHADES OF COLOUR, fill in your details below.

How Art Can Save Your Soul

How Art Can Save Your Soul

How Art Can Save Your Soul.

Lisa-Maree Botticelli

Mindset & Wealth Coach

 

“Art can be a source of help with our problems — our innermost problems — the problems of the soul.”

“Art holds out the promise of inner wholeness,” British philosopher Alain de Botton wrote in Art as Therapy, one of the best art books written.

‘When we leave our soul unattended, our most secret desires and dreams lay hidden. Your task is to uncover them and bring light to your soul.  It is only then, will happiness become a daily practice for your soul to thrive and flourish’.  ~  Lisa-Maree Botticelli

‘You can’t use up creativity.

The more you use, the more you have’.

MAYA ANGELOU

Alain de Botton in his fantastic Sunday sermon from The School of Life, lecture series de Botton founded in 2008, expounds the idea that secular thought can learn a lot from the formats of religion, and went on to reimagine the self-help genre.

De Botton argues that in the 19th century, culture replaced scripture as our culture’s object of worship, but we are no longer allowed to bring our fears and anxieties to this modern cathedral. “It is simply not acceptable to bring the aches and pains of our souls to the guardians of culture,” he laments.

He goes on to explore how we can reclaim this core soul-soothing function of art from the grip of empty elitism and sterile snobbery, focussing on the seven psychological functions of art.

Enjoy this video where Alain Botton talks about Art As Therapy.  When you’ve finished watching the video, scroll down to fill in your details and access your FREE DOWNLOAD to Awaken Your Creative Vision.

“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” ~ Mary Oliver

"We all have a hungry heart, and one of the things we hunger for is happiness." ~ Mary Oliver

We are very vulnerable, fragile creatures in desperate need of support and we generally don’t get it. … Art [can be] a source of help with our problems — our innermost problems — the problems of the soul. . . . Art can be a form of self-help and there is nothing demeaning about the concept of self-help — only the way in which some of self-help has been done so far, but there is nothing wrong with it as a concept . . .

 

There is nothing wrong with [art today]. It’s not the art that’s the problem — it’s the frame around the art. We are simply not encouraged to bring ourselves to works of art. . . . The impact of art is often not what it should be because the frame is wrong.

 

[…]I believe that art should be propaganda of something [other than the Christian church] — not theology, but psychology. I believe that art should serve the needs of our psyche as efficiently and as clearly as it served the needs of theology for hundreds of years.

Art as Therapy is an excellent read in its entirety. Take a closer look at de Botton’s argument and his seven psychological functions of art click here by Maria Popova.

From:  http://www.brainpickings.org/2014/01/08/alain-de-botton-art-as-therapy-talk/

“I believe art is utterly important. It is one of the things that could save us.”

MARY OLIVER

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Get access to AWAKEN YOUR CREATIVE VISION WITH 50 SHADES OF COLOUR by filling in your details below.